Once you find him he should start to chase you, so run away. In one part of the castle there is an area (under the main floor) where you can walk down a tunnel and see (if your perception is high enough, it should be by now) a bunch of supports, highlighted in red. Shoot them, starting from the far end and working your way back towards solid ground. If you get it right you should soon after see a cutscene of Yanmir falling to his death. Now feel free to explore the castle at you leisure (don't mind the kids, there's nothing you can do for them). Also make sure to go back to the Frosgard Jarl and collect your reward (assuming he's still around).
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