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. . .with this year's Christmas keg. So here it is: Elf Amber Night-Before-Christmas Ale! To you newcomers, my magic elf brews will make you happy, but you'll always be able to pass a sobriety test after drinking some, no matter how much you indulge. I never have to worry that including, say, Cascade hops or double-row barley malt will upset some drinkers, because my brews taste exactly like you want them to taste. Prefer Chateau Rothschild to ale? Then that's what it will taste like. Don't like alcoholic beverages? Then your mugful won't contain any. So drink up, my friends, and Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Joyous Kwaanza, Delightful Winterfest to all! (Bones, there's an extra keg for you to take home for you and yours.)
Love to all,
Elf
P. S. Also to newcomers: no, I don't live at the North Pole and help Santa. Those are my cousins.
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